The View From Kalamazoo

Ok, I have a sense of humor. Really.

Despite the witty repartee I must admit that I find so many of these designs…totally un-funny. Dramatically un-funny. Disturbingly un-funny.

Well, except for the president, one.

Designs include:

I CAN KICK YOUR BABY’S ASS (In Ecuador they actually hold “baby brawls”. It’s kind of like cock fighting, only a lot less cock and a lot more baby talk.)

DADDY DRINKS BECAUSE I CRY (My daddy drinks his life away. He drinks away his dreams. Mommy says just one more day, and fills our hearts with screams.)

PLAYGROUND PIMP (Your baby is the baddest ass in the sandbox…get him this baby t-shirt and he’ll be pulling all the baby bitches.)

THEY SHAKE ME! (Shut your baby mouth and stop complaining. At least your father/mother is not Michael Jackson.)

MY IQ IS HIGHER THAN THE PRESIDENT’S! (With this baby shirt you can take pride that your baby is smarter than the puppet who has access to the little red button.)

I ENJOY A GOOD SPANKING (Some babies like it rough. The leading baby shirt in the states of New York, California and 49 of the other 50 states.)

I SHIT MY PANTS AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY T-SHIRT (As if shitting your pants wasn’t reward enough. A Baby Hell, baby t-shirt stinky favorite.)

DADDY’S LIL’ SQUIRT (Remember when your precious, bundle of joy was just a sticky, little puddle of goo who almost ended up on your chin?)

MY PEE-PEE IS BIGGER THAN YOURS! (Let the other boys (and some fully grown men) know who’s in charge with this baby shirt.)

F!#K THE MILK, WHERE’S THE WHISKEY TITS?! (For the future alcoholics of the world. Great baby clothes for casual drinking babies too!)

I HIDE MY CRACK IN MY DIAPER (Baby clothes for all the little thugs and all the little bitches up in this crib, yo.)

ARE YOU MY DADDY? (Rap Stars, Basketball Players, Rock Stars, The Baldwin Brothers: (the top 4 groups accounting for nearly 97% of all the world’s bastards as reported by TIME magazine).)

BROKEN CONDOM (You love your baby now, but remember how you felt when you first found out? Who knew joy felt so suffocating and suicidal?)

POTTY HEAD! (Baby clothes that show the world that your baby supports your almost socially acceptable smoking habits.)

Oh – and this one.

The rest of the site is…interesting, too. I must admit, I did laugh very, very hard at this shirt.

Maybe I’m just somebody’s mother…